Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Fresco Flakes

We are no different, Ive done the same things as you. even last summer when I couldnt get my faces just like I wanted to, and the pupils were still a bit googly, but Id sell paintings anyway and feel like a fraud. Its our self esteem. that is the root problem. we think naaa, nothing good could ever come from me, and we believe it deeply. mine stemmed from my parents who think of me only as a fuck up. but I take on the voice from there. so its a habit. im used to putting myself down. but its a learned pattern. and you can quit it. but you must be vigilant. fuck art school. I went but didnt graduate. who cares. when you are 6 feet under it will not benefit you for having that degree. just live. just paint. procrastination is just another word for fear. we put off because we are afraid we wont be able to do it well, or something like that. like the negative voices in our head we deal with procrastination the same way - just do it do it fast and faster than the negative thoughts so that you cant hear them. procrastination is also our self loathing. we think we dont deserve peace so we cause chaos. I do it ALL the time. but im trying not to. its all self love. i honestly believe that. feeling critical of art is a symptom of a much bigger problem for if we truly believed we deserved peace, love, fun, etc...we wouldn't expect ourselves to be perfect at everything. we wouldnt judge our awkward moments as proof as who we are.





www.artistcellar.com

31 comments:

Bonafyde said...
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Bonafyde said...

Love love love the painting and the product info...those look soooo cool! Must get me some and the paint looks divine too...the sparkly stuff I actually have!

Love your outfit...the hoodie is too cute! There are other excercises besides crunches that work the ABS trust me I too hate the crunch...the best video/DVD I have found that features them is (i kid u not ;) ) Fit to Strip by Carmen Electra, Phenominal video!

8:34 PM

Connie said...

SUziBlu! I love that you are all about glitter & shiny & iridescent & sparkely! Thanks for making your cool videos and especially your super cool art! You rock--like a shiny, glittery one!

Angela said...

Yay! I have some kind of sparkle or metallicy pretties in most things I make :)

BTW, you've reminded me how much I missed hoola'ing. I'm going to make my own hoop, dress it up, and work at learning all the cool moves.

And belly dancing is awesome, there's some videos on YouTube that could help you too.

ironbru1 said...

In my mind I could hoola hoop like that girl. In reality it just didnt come close!
Love the video and lots of great info!

Nina said...

OMG, I grew up w the hoola hoop in the 50's!! Spring is really beautiful here, isn't it? The yard is bloomiin' and the cats and dog look like their lovin' it.

Can't feel bad for you having to get up at 6 - you're a pet servant now like the rest of us!!

VirGINger said...

How do I subscribe to you on this?

scrowlscrowl said...

Suzi -you are great!!

I started journaling because of you; and it gives me so much JOY!!!

Thank you :D

Baptist Friendship House said...
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Karina said...

Suzi,
Your words make me want to cry... sadness b/c of what you (and all of us) have gone through--the outcome of parents and others--
and happiness b/c of how you have made this part of your life into something BEAUTIFUL... and that's what makes life amazing. And your work speaks that to me b/c of this...and helps me to know I can do it too. Thank you.

Lily said...

Hi Suzy
I can relate to so much you've said. I just hit 40 and it's only now I'm really starting to feel free enough to start BEING. You've been a big inspiration to me to start drawing again and learn how to paint after a lifetime of believing I could do neither. Strangely in this process it is unlocking new songs to write and stories to tell.
I adore your artwork :-)

Annabelle said...

You know what,is it the Italian heritage that makes our parents relate to their children like they do??? I know I've been a very good parent and very supportive. Wish I had that when growing up.You really are a great inspiration. Luv your art!

MMB said...

Thank you Suzi- Thank you! I just found your blog and videos about two weeks ago, and I cannot put into words how much what your doing has meant to me; like today. I check your blog looking for a little inspiration, and you said just the thing I needed to hear at that moment! You are my soul-sister...

redpearl said...

Oh Suzi... you are so beautiful! You have a beautiful spirit, too. This post makes me feel so connected to you, like you are my little sister. I just want to hug you right now! So many of us have voices that tell us we aren't good enough whether from parents or friends or past loves. Shame on them for trying to steal our spirits!

Much love and many blessings to you, Suzi!!!

Pearle

Shell said...

Hey Suzi Blu. You rock!!! I totally agree with what you said in your post. Have to do your creative work despite the fear and negative voices in our heads.

The world needs all the beauty and creativity we have to give.

suze said...

SuziBlu...you are soooo loved!This is just a handful of people that think you are great! There are tons more out there. You just need to be yourself. You can't please everyone (even if it is your parents) My father always put me down and the day he died the first thing I thought is that he can't hurt me anymore. Like you said before...art is art and you have your own distinctive style and we love it.
You need to weed out the negative forces in your life and let yourself be happy. I see big things ahead for you.
xo suze:)

3rdEyeMuse said...

sparkaliciously
ultra-exquisite
zaffer-esque
inspiration of

brilliant &
loverly
uber goddess

cheers & bravo! ~M~

ps - I can't help it ... I was born this way. :)

3rdEyeMuse said...

oops, I think my Freudian slip is showing ... that was supposed to be uber-GOODNESS ... though I do kind of see a bit of demi-godess in you. :)

13luckyravens said...

I can't wait for you to show the other products. I bought a "sampler kit" last year at art unraveled and was afraid to start using them.

Yah! I'm glad I found you, you rock.

RAWVOLTA said...

awesome video!
Entertain us more!
but-only if the time allows!
You look great-sparking eyes and beautiful skin, not even mentioning what you do with your free time (art!).
love for YOU!

Eveline said...
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crafty said...

thanx Suzi, you certainly turn my frown :( uoside down :)
hugs
crafty joan in italy

Diane said...

Suzi, Thanks for being vunerable enough to say what you did in your post. Many of us relate. I think we need to start playing a new message in our heads that says...we are worthy, we do deserve good things to come into our lives etc. There was something else that you either put in a video or blog where you said that you CHOOSE to be happy and I thought to myself it IS a choice isn't it? We can either get up in the morning and say I'm miserable and I hate the world or we can say, hello world I'm wondering what wonderful things will be coming my way today.

Jess said...

Thankyou Suzi. You make me happy with your beautiful art and wonderful videos.xx

renee b said...

I think all of the people that read your posts and watch your videos know that you are doing something that is worth while. You make us happy and you are a professional artist that is bringing beauty into the world. That is an honorable profession and life's purpose. The universe had need of someone like you and thus here you are for all of us. Keep making art, because there are enough policewomen, doctors, therapists, teachers, secretaries, librarians...you get the picture. You are you - an artist - and when I get a full time job and am out of student land I will more than happily buy lots of your paintings. Because they are beautiful.

Ms Dragonfly said...

so needed this! thank you :)

Serena said...

I grew up with so many insecurities and no confidence at all. I found art in my 30's. I feel like it grounds me and connects me to who I really am. YOU have been a wonderful inspiration to me, Suzi. You ARE a beautiful person, inside and out!

Serena said...

Ooooops, I meant to say 'thank you' for another wonderful video. I so look forward to them each week. :)

Lisa said...

I'm sorry you keep having to open so many comments from me. I just want to thank you for talking about the times when you weren't well known and you didn't have everything working. Yesterday I painted a background that I adores. COlors that made me happy but I was afraid of the next step...putting something on the background. First, I painted one of your girls. I worked all day on her on watercolor paper and I loved her, even though she was a chubby version of your girls. lol I didn't glue her down though and in the middle of the night I decided I had to do my own thing. Today I finished it with hearts and words and a few embellishments and I'm happy with it. It's me. Yet it is through so many artists like you that I am able to work through things to find my own voice. Thank you Suzi. Ok. I'm done. No more commenting today!!!

SisterJulia said...

women who hula hoop are soooo sexy!

Jane said...

Vincent Van Gogh said, "A painter is a person who paints." Note he did not say, "A painter is a person with an art degree." He didn't even try to draw until he was in his 20s and everybody said he was terrible at it. but he just kept doing it and doing it and looking at great paintings and drawings and if you look at his earliest drawings you can see they were not all that great, but despite terrible illness he was able to improve, so we can too. He also said, "If there are voices telling you can't paint, then by all means paint, and the voices will be silenced." So true. If we can't be free from the inner critic voices when we are making art, well, that is the one place we have the biggest right to be free and to be happy, so you are so right, just keep painting anyway!